A Sleep Regression in Prose

All my grief shows up as sea creatures.

I had a sleep regression around age 10
Something about sharks and my parents
was the recurring nightmare.

I could never spend the night out,
because what if the sharks?
Sleep in my own bed? Never.
Too far from my parents
Who would protect them from the sharks?

I know what you’re thinking,
I must have lived by an ocean.
My home was 51.1 miles from the closest beach.
Did I watch the 1975 movie JAWS? Never.
And yet, my mind had jaws.

While the jagged teeth of the shark are terrifying
It was the jaws of grief that sank into me
in the dark of night as I woke up crying.

I would haul a green sleeping bag
With glow-in-the-dark cows painted on it
and glow-in-the-dark tears painted on me
to the right side of their bed by my Mom.

Towering over my friends at age 10
I was too large to sleep in their full size bed
So I slept on the wooden floor
Ready for underwater battle

And yet, the sharks never came
When I was there on the ground.
And so I kept coming back at night
With the cows. Just in case.

Now, as my children sneak int…